Why we need healers more than ever today and how you can bring light in your own way to this world!

If you asked me 3 years ago if I would be a lightworker in the future, I would have outrightly said no. However, life had a better plan for me and I am so glad my life took this turn and I am so content with the work I do today. Every angel card reading which brings hope to someone makes me happy, every coaching session which boosts someone’s confidence makes me feel elated, every student who further spreads his/her light through my teachings make me so proud of them, every word written by me which inspires someone gives me that inner satisfaction and every little step I take towards lighting up this world makes my heart filled with gratitude.

But when I started my work, there were a few doubts. I kept on thinking, there are so many who are doing this work right now. What will I be able to offer? Looking at all the coaches and lightworkers out there made me feel, “Does the world really need me when there are so many kick ass lightworkers out there“. But as I started exploring the different avenues of my work, I realized “Yes, every lightworker out there has a specific work assigned to him/her and yes each one of them is needed“. I realized my work was needed and those who were meant to be healed by me, came to me anyway. Why just this, actually we need more of these people and I couldn’t agree more with David W. Orr –

The plain fact is that the planet does not need more successful people. But it does desperately need more peacemakers, healers, restorers, storytellers, and lovers of every kind. It needs people who live well in their places. It needs people of moral courage willing to join the fight to make the world habitable and humane. And these qualities have little to do with success as we have defined it.”

We have too many people trying to run this world by infusing fear in all of us. Political rumours and drama, pharmaceutical and medical worlds cashing on our fear of death, media feeding us with all negative news. The world is so volatile today that we really need more of the healers and lightworkers. People who operate on love and not fear.

You may ask me, “How can I be a lightworker?” Or you may say that you don’t have enough funds to take the certifications I took to learn all the tools required to be a healer, coach or a lightworker. But you know what? You can be the light in your own way. And here is how –

  • Infuse joy in your everyday. So much so that when you smile at a stranger, it causes a ripple effect and the happiness spreads.
  • Love yourself and everyone else around you. Love is the answer to everything.
  • Tell your story. Our vulnerable stories heal masses. Forget masses even if one person is healed by your story, your job is done here. Speak about heart breaks, of darknesses, of guilt, of sorrow. And how did you come out of it? What helped you in the darkest of your times. Tell your story!
  • Help each other. Let’s grow together. Let’s progress together. Let’s look out for each other.
  • Give. Give. Give. Always remember, the more you give the more abundant you will feel. Even if it means donating 1 rupee today, do it.
  • Share your art and creativity. Write that blog, sing that song, make that painting, give that speech, dance on the stage. Just let that creativity ooze out of you.
  • And above all, always be in a gratitude mode for all the blessings in your life.

You don’t need a fancy degree or a certification to be a lightworker. What matters is your pure intention and then everything comes so easy to us.

Be the light and spread the light, one step at a time ❤

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Battling the ‘I am not Good Enough’ Syndrome

Ever since school, I have been a shy girl mostly keeping to myself. And then there was the rest of the class. It felt I was never a part of my class. I looked around and I saw confident girls and boys doing their thing. Someone was an ace in academics, someone played football like a pro, someone was so damn beautiful and then there were some who were just plain notorious. But everyone was someone for me. When I looked at myself and tried searching my USP, I couldn’t find any. Some said I had a beautiful handwriting. But what to do with that? You can’t make friends with your handwriting. I was geeky but not amongst the top 3 students in class. I was thin as a drying sheet and by no means beautiful. I was neither popular nor I played any sport. The ‘I am not good enough’ syndrome hit me at a very early age and I kept to myself.

When school parties started happening in high school, I started feeling even more left out. The clothes people wore and the dance moves people did made me feel incomplete in many ways. It was like I was dressed for a house party and people were dressed for that crazy jazz night. Being a part of any group never came easy to me. Even today my school mates remember me as ‘noone’ or someone who didn’t matter. I don’t blame them, I never made an effort to show the real me to anyone.

School was done, I went on to college and again the same story. I was still trying to figure out my niche. Style never came easily to me and the way I dressed and spoke was not really cosmopolitan though I stayed in a city. I had a very popular girl as my best friend during my college days. It seemed she was torn between me and the invitations she got for get togethers. Yes, she was called but not me. She was a very good friend though and tried to include me as much as possible. But her efforts were in vain as I never ever identified with any of the others she hung out with.

Graduation and Post Graduation went by. I was the same – Looking at others thinking how wonderful they are and then looking at myself and remembering each and every imperfection inside me – too thin, can’t speak in public, not very fluent in English as the convent bunch, no style, not very comfortable showcasing my work, inferiority complex in almost everything.

Imagine 24-26 years of my life, repeating the same old mantra every single day to myself. What do you think my life looked like? I didn’t try anything new because I always felt I am not good enough. I didn’t loosen up and was always on guard, because that gave me a little ‘don’t mess with me’ look which kept people away. I never knew how to enjoy life because I thought I am not good enough.

The first change started when I started blogging 5 years ago. I have always been writing and creating poems. But only for me. I never shared it with anyone. But circumstances forced me to write and share my work. I received immense appreciation for my work. People resonated with my stories and took out time to tell me the same. I was in a  foreign land fighting the loneliness with my pen and I loved every bit of it. Writing gave me my outlet, my niche, the my thing! I slowly started growing and blossoming. Till date it has been a wonderful ride with my work being published in many platforms – The Times of India, Sakaal Times, The Elephant Journal, Pink Pangea, Women’s Web, Stylewhack just to name a few. Writing was my safe haven and I loved it!

writing

The second change happened when one of the strangers in a park came up to me and said, “You have a very pure soul. A soul very few possess. Make the most out it”. And she was gone. All this while I was trying to find my niche, it was right inside me. It was like an eye opener. The pureness of my heart and soul, all the while. I kept on looking at everyone else and trying to see if I possess what they have and never realized what I exactly had as a niche.

The rest as they said is history. With certain mind blowing events in my life, today I have made these 2 niches my life purpose. I have come a long way healing myself from all the past trauma and the limiting beliefs. I love writing and I don’t think I am ever going to stop even if no one reads my work. And the purity of my soul which is seen in my coaching and teaching aspect of work.

When I look at my school mates today and see who they have become today, I know somewhere even they struggled with this syndrome. Very few of them really pursued or harnessed their niche.  Yes, I know I did not do much for 26 years of my life or maybe 30. But now when I am doing what I am doing, I feel all of it was worthwhile. It is all a journey and what matters is you find that right path for you sooner or later.

I get messages from my school mates today saying they are so proud of me doing what I do today. And a tiny bird chirps to me and says, “From nobody to somebody”! 

Yes, there are still people around me who are beautiful as hell or who paint like a dream or who are some kick ass orators. But now, I don’t let that intimidate me instead I have more appreciation for what they do. I also have worked so much on myself in the last 3 years that I have created a my kind of beautiful feeling for me. No one can ever make me feel less today.

If you are someone like the young me and are playing the same tape of ‘I am not good enough’ to yourself, remember you matter. You are loved. You are capable of doing it. You just need to start believing in yourself. Keep your hand on your heart and feel it beating for you day in day out. Your heart loves you because you are somebody to it. Why not listen to your heart and transform from nobody to somebody.

My word for 2018!

Since 2015 I have been choosing a word for the new year, instead of having a bunch of resolutions which might just fade away as the year passes. The whole idea of choosing a word instead of some 10 new year resolutions is being true to yourself and sticking to this one singular goal. This one word represents who you want to be and how you want to live.

It was ‘Gratitude’ in 2015, Forgiveness in 2016 and ‘Mindfulness’ in 2017 and it is time to select a word for the upcoming year. A word which I want to work upon all through the year. I have known what the word is going to be since a while now. I have just been trying to soak in what would it entail and how will I work around this word next year.

The word is Strength’.

strength

During my last vacation I realized though I go to the gym and exercise, I still have a long way to go. During one of the hikes at Zion National Park, I could feel my weak legs and my drowning stamina. It was kind of an eye opener for me. A message that what I am doing for my physical fitness isn’t enough. It also kind of made me think if gym is the only answer. To build my physical strength, I want to explore exercise options and find that right balance of fun and sweating it out. So yes, physical strength is going to be one of the major areas to work on.

Next would be emotional strength. Emotional strength doesn’t mean I won’t cry or not feel the hurt. For me it will be more about honoring my feelings and coming out strong. Yes I will cry when I am sad and turn red when angry, but I won’t let these emotions weaken me from within. Instead I want to channelize my emotions into something good and constructive. It’s going to be difficult, but there is this small voice inside me saying I can do it! I do want to try it out.

The next is relationships. I want to build relationships through the strength of integrity. No more phony relationships for me. I want the base to be solid, the foundation to be strong. Over the past one year I have made so many soulful connections via the virtual world and I want to continue that trend. Having people around me who understand me. At the same time, I have let go all the drama and unwanted relationships which drained me. I want to continue and build relationships based on integrity.

And last but not the least – spiritual strength. No more hiding in the closet, shutting down my beliefs with the fear of what will the world think of my path and my work. I am done hiding and now I will be shining my light brighter. 2018 is going to mark the beginning of me finally breaking free from the shackles of society’s opinion about the work I do!

Strength is also a 11 numbered card in Tarot and 2018 is also a master number 11. I just feel so connected with both of these aspects! This is no coincidence for sure.

Strength

So yes, the word for 2018 is strength. Let’s see how I embrace this word and it’s true connotation for me in the coming year.

If you had to choose a word for 2018, what would it be?

 

2017 – The Year of Finding My Life Purpose

I started with the tradition of summing up my years from 2014, made it through 2015 and 2016 and now this is the fourth year I am trying this yet again. This exercise makes me go through the year and revisit all the good and the bad, focusing on the lessons learnt and excited about what is yet to come.

The year for us did not start on a very great note. We saw a massive door of opportunities being shut on us early on, something which we never expected. And then Sujoy had a nasty football injury which made him be out of the sports scene for almost 3 months. We brooded and cursed our fate and through that darkness, started my quest to look for my life purpose. If I have to mention one biggest thing that happened in 2017, then it will be me finding my life purpose! Hands down!

The Achievements
As life showed it’s bitter phases, I have been really blessed to see the light in all the darkness. This year somehow I was guided to the right teachers and courses which has helped me to realize my life purpose. Today, I am a certified Holistic Life Coach for women from the University of Wellness and I am very proud to see the phenomenal difference I have created in my clients’ lives. I have worked with clients who went through domestic violence, clients who wanted to create their own identity and clients who were so willing to come out of their scarce mentality. Life has been so fulfilling.

Today, I am a Doreen Virtue and Radleigh Valentine certified Angel Intuitive and Angel Card Reader. I have guided so many souls with careers, relationships and life issues. It gives me immense gratitude when what I have learnt is getting used to better someone else’s life.

I went beyond my fears and did FB lives too. It was nerve wrecking and yet so exciting. All of this I could do because my people supported me and boosted me morally. Not just freinds and family but the tribe I have made through my FB page. They were there to cheer me up and stood tall behind me 🙂

I have been blessed truly in this aspect and I cannot thank the Almighty enough for ALL of this! I am truly humbled to be able to touch so many lives for the better.


Fell in Love with Colors Again
I was fortunate enough to get connected with Pooja, my childhood friend who also landed up in Chicago when we were there! I rekindled my love for colors and learnt some basic painting from her! She is a great artist and taught me so patiently. I have always had an artistic side to me, thanks to my father but somehow lost it over the years. I loved painting and we did some great work together. Painting is kind of like meditation for me, where I forget the rest of the world when I am so tuned into my work. Sitting for hours and creating art is indeed so rejuvenating. It does not matter if I am good at it or not, what matters is it gives me peace and happiness.

From Chicago to Boston
Our Chicago stay was short lived and we moved to Boston in June this year. We were excited because we were going to be close to family. Though I did not like the place at the beginning, the city actually grows on you. We roamed quite a bit during the summer and started falling in love with the city. Boston is the perfect mix of culture, food, beaches and hills. And some of the hiking trails are so beyond beautiful. I think every place we stay leaves a mark on us forever. Boston really made us feel at home for sure!

Pujo Fun
This was the first year in our entire US stay that we went pandal hopping and had such great fun during pujo. Bengalis and pujo fun cannot be separated. With Paula di and family around, we had so much merriment during pujo. We hogged on khichudi and witnessed some good cultural programs. Decking up and seeing different pujos brought back all the dating years memories back to me. Those were the days when Sujoy and me went to pandals and hogged on chinese and chops making sure no one sees us 😛

Pujo 2017

Oh! The Travels!
After witnessing snow for the first time in Chicago and being trapped at home for almost 6 months, when summer arrived we decided to spend each weekend outdoors exploring the nearby places. And we did exactly that! We saw many places in and around Chicago. Sujoy’s uncle, aunty and cousin visited us in Chicago and we roamed with them too. It was a different experience being a host and cooking those special meals for them.

Chicago

When we came to Boston, it was summer and we went out every weekend exploring new cities and trails. My most loved places were a jazzy town called Newport,  seeing the fall colors in White Mountains and trailing along the Blue Hills reservation which is so near our place.

Boston

And towards the end we did the most awaited West Coast Trip and it was epic! It was one week packed with adventure, nature, man made cities and pure fun. We visited Grand Canyon, Antelope Canyon, Vegas, Zion National Park, Los Angeles and Death Valley National Park. Each place was different and each had it’s own story to tell. It was a trip I did minus the social media and it was so enthralling. My best moments were trailing through Zion National Park, looking at the sunset at Grand Canyon, getting blind sighted at the lights on the Vegas strip and looking at the Santa Monica beach landscape covered with mountains! Bliss!

West Coast

The highlight of this trip was connecting with old friends. I had such a memorable time with all my friends. It was all worthwhile!

Being a Better Human Being Each Single Day
This has been the hardest and yet the most rewarding part of this year. Every single day waking up and trying to be a better human being than yesterday. Every single day waking up and letting go of the anger and judgement of yesterday. Every single day waking up and letting go of mistakes and forgiving myself and others. Every single day waking up and being thankful for all the blessings in my life. Every single day waking up and meditating. Every single day waking up and hitting the gym being better than yesterday. Every single day waking up and eating healthy. Every single day waking up and drawing boundaries. Every single day waking up and not letting anyone or anything have control over me. Every single day waking up to make the best of the day.

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Every single day waking up and praying for everyone’s wellbeing!

2017 has been phenomenal for me! It has made me grow in ways I never imagined I could grow. They say 2017 is the number 1 year in the 9 year cycle, the seeds you sowed this year is just the beginning. If this year is the just the beginning, I cannot imagine what my next years will look like! And till then, what will remain constant is my quest to help, be a better person each single day and finally own my truth!

Can’t wait for 2018! Bring it on!

How was your 2017 and what were your greatest achievements?

 

 

 

The Day of My Awakening

I haven’t spoken about that day to anyone as yet, not even my husband. The day when I came out of my darkness. A darkness of emotional and physical turmoil gnawing at me from the inside. I don’t know why but I felt like sharing that sacred moment of my life with everyone today. I still vividly remember that day as if it was just yesterday –

I was at my bottom low, not wanting to do anything in life. I woke up grudgingly, forcing myself to the bathroom for a shower. I don’t know how and when, but at one point I was kneeling down in the bath tub with my hands folded and the shower water running through my head, face and body. I was down on my knees sobbing incoherently and I prayed. Those words which came from me that day are still etched on my mind. I said, “I surrender to you today. I surrender from the tiniest cell in my body. I give it all to you now. Please show me a way. Tell me what path have you chosen for me. Just tell me”.

I was in my most vulnerable state then. Naked in my skin and naked in my soul. Pouring out everything to Him. And in that moment, I felt something in my body. It was as if someone was uplifting me. It was as if someone was embracing me. My sobs became louder and my tears uncontrollable. It was as if I was letting it all out. I was still sitting down in the bathtub with the shower water pouring on me but I was slowly feeling free.

That was my day of awakening!

I did not know what to expect next. But somehow He led me and showed me my path. I stumbled across Hay House World Angel Summit which was free where many lightworkers were talking about angels and how to connect with them. It was then that I came to know about Doreen Virtue and Archangel Michael. I learnt that Archangel Michael is the one who helps you with your life purpose. He also protects you. That day after hearing to Doreen Virtue’s talk, I kneeled again. I called upon Archangel Michael and asked him to help me with my life purpose. The words didn’t matter but my intention did. It was an outcry for help. After that I kept on seeing Michael at the oddest of places, a sign that he was around. I saw Michael while watching television, I came across books whose authors were named Michael. It was as if Michael was everywhere. Archangel Michael Oracle cards was the first deck I bought before even I learnt the art of card reading. I started doing self readings, picking a card every single day and felt the strong connect with Archangel Michael. He seemed to know what I needed the most and gave me some profound messages each day.

And then I found a FB post about University of Wellness and it’s Life Coach certification. I have always been an innate coach. During my career as a Human Resource personnel, I have strived for women empowerment and coached women unknowingly in my own way at my workplace in Qualcomm, Chennai. No wonder I felt drawn to this coaching certification. I spoke with the founder and teacher of the course Kerissa Kuis, but the course fees was way above my league. I gave up on it. But something kept on pushing me and I contacted her again. While I was chatting with her on messenger, one of the words autocorrected to ‘Michael’. I knew then this was a sign and I have to take up this course. I asked Kerissa again if it was possible to pay the fees through installments and she agreed. And there I was, enrolled in a course which I could not afford financially and yet all of it fell in place. I cannot thank the Lord enough for this course, Kerissa and the tribe I earned here!

Soon later came an offer from Hay House on their Angel Intuitive Course where the prices were slashed to half along with easy installment option. I was thirsty to know more about angels and connect with them. And I enrolled for that course too. As this course progressed and I started learning about archangels and angels, my intuition started becoming stronger. I started seeing angel flashes and messages started coming to me. And before I knew Archangel Raziel started to show up in my life. Archangel Raziel helps in understanding the esoteric secrets of life and slowly a lot of things started unfolding before me. His color is the rainbow and he started showing up in the weirdest of places.

The puzzles of life started unfolding. I started getting messages on what I should be working on. The major lesson was ‘forgiveness’. The story of my forgiveness journey needs a separate post. But I will tell you one thing which I learnt from it, “Forgiveness was for me and not for them who wronged me”. I had to forgive my own mother, I had to forgive people who treated my grandparents inhumanly, I had to forgive a friend who is no more and I had to forgive loved ones too. And above all, I had to forgive myself. 

But all along this way, He made sure I met the right people and teachers which made this journey worthwhile. Whenever I think of that day when I was stripped off naked in that shower in spirit and in body, my eyes well up in gratitude. Today when I finally share this story, I don’t have any inhibitions or fear of what will people think about me talking to angels or being so spiritually grounded or that Archangel Michael is always around me. My intention here is not to make you believe in the things I do but to share a story coming from my heart.

The last one year I have experienced what ‘surrender’ feels like, how difficult ‘letting go’ is, the high vibration I feel in my body every time I kneel in gratitude and how human I am when I am at my most vulnerable state. I learnt that when you take one step ahead, the Universe takes 10 steps towards you. I realized, the only way from a rock bottom is ‘up’.

That day in August last year, I really became free! The day of my awakening! And now I am on a path to awaken others!

 

 

 

What Kangana Ranaut’s recent interview made me think!

Yes, we love her! We love her for her guts, we love her for speaking her mind fearlessly and we love her the way she makes every fight seem so within our limits. And her recent blatant interview at Aap ki Adalat made everyone go in awe!

But along with awe, her interview brought a lot of other sentiments for me!

One of the things which has been evident in her interview and looking at all her relationships is that our men are not trained to handle such aggressive women. When I say aggressive, I don’t mean dominating women. I mean women who love themselves fiercely, women who want to do something in their life on their own and women who know what exactly they want in their life. Our patriarchal society doesn’t help men either who want to support such women. Take a look around you and see what the reality shouts out when it comes to such fierce women. How are they treated? How are their relationships? We still need to come a long way as a society to evolve and be able to accept such fierce women.

I didn’t like that she was asked the question, “Weren’t you afraid while fighting against them?” Do we ask this question to men? Why do we still glorify men who cook and women who stand and speak up. Isn’t it natural? Isn’t it the way it is supposed to be irrespective of our gender? I become a strong woman when I speak up for myself. But isn’t that a basic right for every living being? In today’s progressive world we are still asking these questions to women and it says so much about our still regressive society.

While women can be best friends, we still don’t see that sisterhood enough in our friendships. After Kangana spoke, no one has come to her aid or supported her. I don’t see other women from the bollywood fraternity being with her. To be frank, I don’t see any female friends around her. Why most of us women let go of our friendships and just revolve around our families or our careers? Why don’t we get involved in sisterhood projects. Women are the future and it won’t happen if we bicker and fight amongst ourselves. Pick up that phone and call that childhood friend. It is never late to nurture friendships and NOW is the time!

And lastly, sometimes I feel that in all this ‘feminism’ hue and cry we tend to forget the good men in the society. How much time during the interview was spent on talking about Anurag Kashyap or other men who helped Kangana? All we did was concentrate our focus on the wrongdoings of a few men. That paints a dramatically different picture and makes us think good doesn’t exist in our society anymore. But that isn’t the whole truth, right? We slammed the bad men and applauded Kangana for all that she did and forgot about the good men. We got carried away by her so called ‘bravery’ and no one thought about asking “But hey, what about the good men in your life?”

Yes, we made Kangana our ‘hero’. But in doing so we failed as a society. And that hurts. It hurts so bad.

What can we do to change this?

 

Different Hugs, Different Stories

We had gone to the flea market last weekend. We meaning myself and Sujoy’s cousin and her family. Sujoy was busy watching a live soccer match at Gillette Stadium that day which I confidently told everyone that it was a El-Clasico match 😛 More details about that sometime later!

Flea Market

The Women in Blue at the Flea Market!

So we reached this flea market and Sudeep da dropped us at the venue and went ahead to park his car. Paula di, Riya and I were wandering through the stalls. It was a while till Sudeep da found a parking in the always busy Boston Downtown. When he returned , Riya who is 9 years old ran towards him and hugged him! It was as if they were meeting after a long time though it was just 15 minutes. Ah! That pure moment of proximity between two individuals who really love one another and expect nothing in return! Such a simple gesture and yet so comforting.

Riya’s spontaneous hug got me thinking – How often do we hug?

It also brought back memories of some treasured hugs in my life.

The Bidai Hug

The last of the ceremonies in an Indian marriage is the bidai (farewell), where the bride’s side give a farewell to the bride. It is a very emotional moment for the bride’s side.  After the bidai, the bride and the groom leave for the groom’s place leaving behind ‘us’.

Hug

Can you feel that overwhelming love?

I remembered mine. Almost all of us were teary eyed. During my bidai, I hugged my father so tightly that I didn’t want to let him go. It was two human beings who love each other unconditionally just being in the moment, expressing their love through actions and no words. Two human beings who share the deepest of love, care, and affection. It was such a pure unadulterated moment, only heartfelt endearment. Tears rolling from both our eyes and we didn’t care who was around us. It was just us in the moment! I still shudder from thinking about that time! #Goosebumps

The Soul Sister Hug

Hug

Hugging! ❤

Last year during my India trip I finally met my soul sister Shweta. We had been working together virtually for almost 2 years and this was the first time I met her. We had been to Mumbai for some official work and were staying together. It was kind of my girl night out endeavour which I have done very rarely in my teens. And one of those evenings, we just let out all that was bothering us. We spoke for hours and hours pouring out the darkest of our secrets and the side of your life you don’t share on FB. And at the end of it all, we hugged. Hugged to reassure that we are there for each other. Hugged to communicate how much we love each other. Hugged to feel that soul sister connect!

My soul sister needs a hug right now and here is one I am sending out to her!

The Tree Hug

Tree Hug

Therapeutic!

I have hugged a tree too! It is so damn therapeutic. No judgement, no false pretenses just sacred bond. Hugging a tree connects you to mother earth too with the tree roots. Try doing it and see how you open up from within. I love hugging trees, usually the ones with giant trunks. Boston is full of huge tree trails and I never miss a chance to hug those trees on the way.

I am a hugger. Always have been. I believe a tight hug can make you forget all the shit in your life at least for 30 seconds. And with my energy work now, I can pick up on people’s energies and sense who might need a hug. I don’t always hug that person but send some healing energy their way!

A small hug made me visit all these stories yet again.

What is your hug story? How often do you hug? Do let me know in comments below 🙂

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